THE ONION

It was only in February of 1999 that I discovered The Onion, a weekly online newspaper that grew out of the printed version.  I laughed out loud ten times in five minutes.

The Onion is a professionally produced Web site that delivers absurd and yet sometimes surprisingly close-to-home news articles in a dead-pan style in the manner of USA Today.  Whoever writes this stuff is good at it.  It is hilarious, and you should go there once every week.

Even the headlines are funny.   Here are a few:

-- Routine Drunk-Driving Trip Turns Tragic For Five Local Teens

-- Worthless Dog Can't Talk, Drive, Solve Crimes

-- The Y2K Bug: How Will It Affect The Rapture?

-- ACLU Defends Nazis' Right to Burn Down ACLU Headquarters

-- Casual One-Nighter Gives Jesse Helms Change Of Heart on Gay Issue

  

This article, only the headline of which is important, appeared in The Kansas City Star on March 7, 2002, so I guess his heart switched back.

 

 

-- Nine Drawn And Quartered At Out-Of-Hand Renaissance Fair

-- Study Reveals: Babies Are Stupid

and my favorite so far

-- Panhandlers' Strike Enters Third Week

And you also get your weekly meaningless factoid box:

        STATshot A look at the numbers that shape your world

And here's another:

OK, now I trust your delicate good taste and sensitive nature, so I want to go to THE ONION just to see what you and so many other people're talking about.