Easy Steps

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This is a direct scan of the box of a Swanson TV dinner called, and I quote, "Kids Meal."

Now, I can understand, maybe, why there's no apostrophe at all, i.e., everyone at Swanson who approved the name was unaware that it should be Kid's Meal.

And, for example, it seems to me the Swanson people should have realized that Step #2 all by itself consists of three steps.

But no matter what, I find it nearly impossible to believe that not one of those people can successfully count past 3.

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Here's a much, much better example. The Fiesta-brand gas grill we bought in May of 2003 came in a box that says quite plainly, in huge letters, in no uncertain terms, that there are "5 easy steps" to assembling it. And, as you can see, it shows those 5 easy steps.

As it turns out, there are a few more. I can see how, maybe, if it turned out to be 6 or 7, or even 9 or 10, you could call it 5.

But according to their own instruction sheet inside the box, it's at least 60 steps.

It's like saying there are two steps to performing a leg amputation

Step 1) Remove the leg.
Step 2) Sew up the stump.

The fact is this grill, rated by Consumer Reports as a "Best Buy," has otherwise turned out to be OK, but it certainly cannot be assembled in five steps. For Fiesta to be off by a factor of 12 is significant. If they don't mind exaggerating so wildly in their favor in their box signage, where else might they be fooling you?

And make no mistake, they do want to fool you. They want you to think it really is 5 easy steps so you'll buy it.